"When Your Toddler Ruins Your Christmas Pictures," and other things that will make you want to drink before noon

Apparently I'm a weather brat. Or it could be that the South is bipolar (sometimes literally). 90 degrees with full humidity is a little too hot, but 30 degrees with whipping wind is a little too cold. Why can't it just be 65 degrees sometimes? Friday was the chilliest day we've had in a very long time, and most definitely the coldest day that Vivi has experienced in her short little life.

HELP ME

Bobby was getting antsy from baking with me all day and begged to go outside for our daily let's-scare-the-neighbors stroll. We all bundled up--which took approximately 54 minutes--and then went out the front door.

Wanna know something else that's bipolar? A toddler.

As I was engaging in the wrestling maneuver also known as "strapping a baby in an Ergo carrier alone," Bobby was pointing and grunting and crawling into the stroller, obviously indicating that he was ready to go. I picked him up to put him in the seat, and he went totally limp. Fell to the ground dramatically. Which pulled me (with Viv in tow) to the ground. So all three of us were lying on the pavement like turtles stuck on our backs. It only took four more tries and a threat of time out before I could get him to comply and get into the stroller. Ya know, since he was the one who demanded it in the first place.

Not amused.

Then we walked a few rounds, with my pants dropping lower and lower due to the unfortunately-placed Ergo in combination with the unfortunate nature of my spandex exercise pants (spoiler alert: I did not exercise. Unless you consider baking exercise, which I do). I think we succeeded in our goal of scaring the neighbors for Friday.

Wearing these probably didn't help.

After the sun set at 4:30, we went inside to start dinner. I decided to make spaghetti, since Bobby is going through a bizarre picky phase. I know he loves anything with marinara, and since he housed almost an entire pan of lasagna Tuesday night, I figured spaghetti was a safe bet. Wrong. Wouldn't touch it. Wouldn't even look at it.

Seriously, kid, my cooking's not THAT bad.

I can't even eat spaghetti (long story), so this entire meal was only edible to one person. And bless his heart, Alex ate the entire 4-person spaghetti dinner over the span of the weekend. And Bobby ate an orange and went to bed hungry. I will give my family fruit and vegetables to try to fill their bellies, but I will NOT make a separate main dish if someone doesn't like what is served. Tough titty said the kitty. Jesus, I am starting to sound like my mama. But now I understand how my mama used to feel when she would cook something that we wouldn't eat. It's enraging. It makes you want to throw a pot of boiling water across the room. (I didn't. But I thought about it.)

I had been looking forward to sleeping in some this weekend, but it wasn't in the cards on Saturday, as we had to wake up and get ready for jet pictures. Jet pictures are exactly what they sound like--you take family pictures in the fighter jets, and they are a perfect Christmas card picture. 

Cute, right? Well not this year.

We have used jet pictures for our past 3 Christmas cards, and I was planning to do the same this year. My goal was to not look like a disheveled mess, so I got up to actually shower and put on makeup. I stood up to find myself with incredibly sore thighs. I haven't exercised in days years, unless we are still considering baking to be exercising, so there was no reason for my thighs to be this sore. Which means that I am now sore from just every day living. Which means I've hit a new all-time low.

Well that, and the fact that I mainline these instead of eating salad.

We were ready to leave the house at 10am, but we didn't actually pull out of the driveway until well after 11. That's because we had to run back inside for 84,000 different things. Forgot extra diapers. Forgot Vivi's bow. Bobby lost his shoe. Forgot the cake for the bake sale. Forgot the knife to cut it. Forgot the mini pies. You know how it goes when you have little ones. We finally got there, got in the jet, looked at the photographer, and Bobby absolutely lost his shit. He not only refused to look or smile, but refused to act like a member of the human race. Bucking, screaming, head-thrown-back as if he were being waterboarded by Al-Qaeda. I'm lucky I don't embarrass easily.

Won't play on a real fighter jet, but will play on the floor-cleaning machine.

The poor photographer offered to take a head shot of him calm on the ground so he could try to photoshop the calm face on the wild-animal body, but I told him that would be an effort wasted. I guess we really will have a Christmas card of outtakes this year. It's cool; sometimes those are the best. It's just a snapshot of our life frozen in time from this particular moment.

In other news, Vivi said her first word this weekend. She looked right at Alex and said "da-da," ever so sweetly and precisely. And then Saturday night she said her second word. She said "uh-ga" during the UGA/Auburn game. There's a chance this was incoherent babbling, but I'm going with the theory that she is a genius and a football enthusiast.

And a scientist.

She's also the funniest. This is how she watched the game Saturday. 

Girlfriend has really been letting herself go lately.

She and Bobby are so sweet together and play together so well. It warms my heart to see them love each other. 

I know I give him a lot of crap, but he is the sweetest little dude there is :)

 I was so excited to pull out some Christmas books for Bobby. My favorite part of the day is right before his bedtime, when he sits in my lap quietly while I read him books and then say prayers. You can catch up on all the best Christmas books for little ones in this post.

I finally called it a draw on Sunday night. I wanted Bobby to eat something, as he had spent a weekend consuming only oranges, apples, and milk, so we had chicken nuggets for dinner. Yes, frozen chicken nuggets. And yes, all of us. But wouldn't you know, that's the one thing all weekend that he completely downed. No homemade spaghetti, no fresh cake...but the kid houses a plate full of frozen chicken nuggets. Toddlers really are a-holes.

Exhibit A

But then they're completely heart-meltingly adorable.

I am looking forward to making some soups this week. Possibly this dill pickle soup, this jalapeno corn chicken soup, or this cauliflower chowder. Or maybe all three. Soups are our favorite when it's cold. I made this buffalo chicken soup a couple of weeks ago, and it was one of the best soups I've ever had (topped with plenty of bleu cheese, of course), although I paid for it afterward. I am also looking forward to a chilly week in front of our fireplace, baking a Frozen themed cake for a birthday party, and hitting the road for Thanksgiving festivities this upcoming weekend. Hope everybody has a wonderful Monday!

Keep on keepin' on!

-Annette